Thursday, Mar 05th

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Haters from 30 States Sign a Petition to Secede from the United States

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secede from the union

If anyone thought that after the election the hate would dial down a few notches, you were wrong.  Obama Election Rage Syndrome continues to infect a significant portion of the population.  And now much like the walking dead the infected are among us, spewing their hatred in increasingly public ways.  It's like the Racist Apocalypse. Now the infected have taken to the internet to proclaim that they can no longer stomach a black president, and so they would like their state to secede from the United States.

 

Residents in more than 30 states have filed secession petitions with the "We the People" program on the White House website.

Petitions to strip citizenship of individuals signing onto petitions to secede and exile them have also been submitted.

A threshold of 25,000 signatures must be met within 30 days for petitions to be reviewed. The Obama administration explains, "If a petition meets the signature threshold, it will be reviewed by the Administration and we will issue a response."

Micah H. (no last name provided) of Arlington, Texas filed a petition that had nearly 60,000 signatures as of Tuesday morning. It reads:

The US continues to suffer economic difficulties stemming from the federal government's neglect to reform domestic and foreign spending. The citizens of the US suffer from blatant abuses of their rights such as the NDAA, the TSA, etc. Given that the state of Texas maintains a balanced budget and is the 15th largest economy in the world, it is practically feasible for Texas to withdraw from the union, and to do so would protect it's citizens' standard of living and re-secure their rights and liberties in accordance with the original ideas and beliefs of our founding fathers which are no longer being reflected by the federal government.

Sigh.

 

I would like to make a few suggestions to all the poor, poor, little disappointed tea bag infected souls who signed the petition to secede. First, be honest with why you want to leave.  Don't give me all of these made up reasons about the economy, the TSA, etc.  These things were there when Bush was president, and you didn't want to leave then.  So just be brutally honest.  Your tender little psyche can't handle a black president.  Say it. Own it. Embrace it.  Being honest with one's self is incredibly freeing, and may even help release some of that pent up anger.

Next, you are more than welcome to leave.  The rest of us would love for you to go. Without you here maybe Limbaugh and all the other performers on the Hate Parade Network will find other things to do and shut up.   It will be a relief to be able to turn on the TV or surf the internet and not see your dog whistle blowing quotes...or to see someone newly infected with the hate virus having spasms in the street.  What a wonderful peaceful country it would be!  The rest of us could actually sit down and discuss how to solve issues and make the country a nice place to live for everyone without the constant distraction of watching out for the crazies in the corner.

And lastly, may I suggest that there is a nice island made of trash floating in the pacific ocean that would be a perfect place for you and your hate infected brethren to settle. No other country has claimed it, it is currently uninhabited, and it's big enough that you can be free to bellow your little hate filled tirades and push people you don't like off into the ocean and no one will notice or care.  May I suggest that you turn in your passports (if you even have one) and self deport to the newly formed Republic of Hatelandia before January.  The rest of us would like to celebrate the new year with a hate infection free country.  Thank you, and don't come back.

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